When moderators are "on your face" and hypocritical

I recently discovered what I thought was, at the time, a really good historical romance oriented FB group.  For the first 2-3 months of my participation there, things were perfectly fine.  Then, from one day to another, another moderator "popped up".  As background, the group is supposed to control promotion posts and that includes self-promotions.  Well, this admin has her own reviews blog and that's how she pretty much came back to the group (apparently she had been on hiatus).  She also started "policing" posts, continued mentioning her own reviews, tried to start discussions to make the group more active (not that it needed it, btw, this group was moving along really well without her "assistance").  We later (the members of the group) found out she's also writing her own HR book.  Most of the pieces of the puzzle (her pushiness to promote discussion, her questions about writing and what readers like, etc.) fell into place at that point.  Someone must have said something about her own self-promotion though, as she went ahead and created a "sister group" for promotions and more writer oriented because why not benefit from the already established membership in the original group.   Personality wise, it also became obvious that she has to be the "leader of the pack".  Sadly, I realized from the moment she came back and posted about her own blog, that my days in the group were numbered... and I was right.

To make the story short, and I acknowledge this was my fault, I posted something that could have invited controversy.  The admin I dislike, of course, had to jump in to "intervene".  It wasn't really necessary at that point, but the point is moot... She did it in such a way that it looked like an attack on my post.  I confronted her as a reply to her comment, and then proceeded to delete my post and remove myself from the group.  She PMd me to justify her actions and alleging that it was not an attack on me or my post... then got defensive and in her "justification" proceeded to make the hole she had dug herself in even larger.  I kept my replies to her PMS purposefully very VERY limited and controlled.  She ended up saying that I was welcome to return.  I said thanks (mentally adding "... but no thanks"), and didn't further interact.

Sometimes I miss the group, though there was quite a bit of repetition, I liked login on a few times a day to read posts.  A lot of recommendations are posted.  People ask for recommendations on specific tropes, people post asking for books for which they can't remember titles but rather plot points, etc. ....and then I remember who's "managing" it.   If I go back it is an acknowledgement that she was right in saying things the way she did... which is not the case.  She could have managed this differently, but the equivalent of public humiliation is what she chose.  As some say, hindsight is 20/20, though.  If I do go back it will not be under my main FB account because, frankly, I don't want to reassure her that she is alright... because she is not.  Call me petty if you want.  I understand her "I need to protect this group" policy, but not when she's treating everyone as if it is kindergarten and have this terrible need to assert her dominance.

Most of my activity there was confined to commentary on other members' posts rather than posting my own... and even more so once that one showed up.  She had already deleted another post of mine regarding plagiarism, because it was linking to an article on Nora Roberts, who was involved in a recent particular incident in which many authors' work was plagiarized and she went after the plagiarist.  The admin said that some people were "upset".  I know it was BS, she just misread my intent.  She thought it was an I love Nora Roberts post which it's funny, because I don't like Roberts' work.  I posted that because many of the authors plagiarized were, actually HR authors and that's why it was relevant to the group's topic (HR).  But I digress...

If I sound resentful, it's because I am.  I was enjoying it, felt that it was a unique group, and all it took was for one person to flush that down the toilet.  Oh and yes, I have created my own group, but it still needs work, and I am not sure I have what it takes to admin a forum/group again.  That's why I said I understand her need to protect.  I've been a mod/admin.  Either way, this is a venting post.  I needed to take this off my chest in some way.